Partial Translations for Himitsu no Arashi-chan #9... and I say partial because the episode is so long that I didn't bother to do a word-by-word transcription.
BUT, to make up for that, I have stuffed the entry with CAPS. For. Um. Illustrating purposes. *cough*
Enjoy!
Episode credits to the lovely![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif)
ferfa
WARNING: Long entry.
Sho: First of all, we have this: Hana Yori Dango Final, in theatres June 28th.
Caption: [Hana Yori Dango Series, in the role of Doumyouji Tsukasa: Matsumoto Jun]
Jun: Wait just a sec here –
Nino: That’s him right here!
Sho: And with that, we also have THIS: In commemoration of the opening of this movie, today, we’ll be doing the special HANA YORI MATSUJUN, Project Love-Love Attack!
Jun: Um. S’cuse me, sorry, let me just get this straight. I am indeed in a movie called Hana Yori Dango Final –
Aiba: Coming out June 28th, right?
Jun: Right. But it has…absolutely nothing to do with this show.
Sho: Stop raining on the parade!
Aiba: Think about our feelings! This is our selfless love to you from all of us!
Jun: What is this Love-Love Attack anyway…?
Sho: The plan this time is, seeing as it’s the HanaDan Final Special, we will be loaning MatsuJun out for a day, to go on a date.
Narrator: Yes, MatsuJun will be going out on a date with the winner today! And the four contestants will be…?
Sho: What do you think, Matsushima-san?
Matsushima: The person in question seems to have no motivation to do this at all. Are you sure this is okay?
Jun: Hold on, I don’t even get what’s going on!
Sho: He’s just twitching with anticipation, is all.
Matsushima: Ah, I see.
Jun: I’m twitching, but for a different reason.
Fantasy #1: (And watch Jun SINK TO HIS KNEES in uncontrollable laughter. XD) Jun and I would be walking along the beach, when suddenly, he’d ask me “Have I told you I love you?” (Jun: Nope!) No, you’ve never told me! Today, I’ll give you a bath! I promise to show you how deeply I’ve fallen for you.
Ooshima: (Man, I LOVE this lady XD) I don’t care if I have to get down and dirty today. I’m gonna WIN!
Aiba: Come on, Ooshima-san. Take a look at MatsuJun.
Ooshima: *Looks. Hyperventilates* It’s really him!
Matsushima: You love him so much that you’d need your husband’s permission, wouldn’t you?
Ooshima: Uh-huh.
MatsuJun: Are you serious? *0__0*
Ooshima: I’m serious here!
Fantasy #2: Cool and handsome MatsuJun as a prosecutor in court would be interrogating me closely. In the court of Love, I will lose to no one! I’ll win Jun’s heart!
Sho: We have the Lawyer Sumita-san with us.
Sumita: Thank you for having me here today.
Ooshima: Don’t touch him! Don’t you TOUCH HIM!
Sumita: I think I’m a half-step ahead of my competition today.
Aiba: Ah. Because MatusJun likes older women, ne?
Nino: Ooshima-san!
Ooshima: Shuuuuuu….
Nino: Stop with the Shuu-shuu! You’re doing it on TV!
Fantasy #3: Jun-kun would grab the water bottle that I was drinking from and take a swig with a casual “Lemme have a sip?” (Jun: Who IS that?) It would be an indirect kiss! I’ll show him my knockout swing in the arena of love!
Jun: What’s with this music?
Sho: This is a change of pace. So, Hokuto-san, you’re a fan of MatsuJun’s?
Hokuto: Well, you see, I’m good friends with Aiba-kun and Kensuke. But when I asked him for Matsujun’s mail address, he wouldn’t tell me! So obviously, I had to come in person to get him for myself.
(Aiba is a dependable and trustworthy bandmate! He doesn’t let random ppl access the other members! Unlike Drunk!Ohno *cough* who will dial up Nino for any John, Dick, or Harry who asks. At 2:00am in the morning.)
Fantasy #4: In a café where we can see the harbour, we’d be sharing a fruit parfait between the two of us. And when Jun sees the whipped cream on my face, he would lick it off me. (Nino: Is she a perv?) Today, I’ll definitely win Jun’s heart! (Jun: I don’t lick!)
Yasuha: Actually, me and Jun have a secret too!
Sho: What? What? WHAT? What is it?!
Nino: Look at that face! *points at Ooshima*
Sho: Oh, Ooshima-san…
Nino: These things can’t be helped! If you have them, you have them! These are the facts.
Aiba: Tell us what the secret is!
Yasuha: Maybe later… *secretive smile*
Sho: Today, we have gathered four outstanding fans of MatsuJun together on this show.
Sumita: Would you think that it’s strange to have four weird women gathered here for you?
Hokuta: Speak for yourself, Ms. Lawyer!
Ooshima: We’re not weird!~
Nino: Let’s not fight, now!
(Commence first of many bitch-fights over Matsu that we will witness this episode.)
Ooshima (to Yasuha): DON’T TOUCH HIM! SERIOUSLY! You know, I’ve got to say, didn’t you get divorced just a little while ago? And aren’t you here ON THE REBOUND? Don’t you dare come here with half-hearted feelings! She doesn’t need MatsuJun, she’d be okay with anyone!
Aiba: Stop her, MatsuJun! Stop her!
MatsuJun: Now, now, now. *touches her arm*
Ooshima: Aan ^__^
Aiba: Yosh! Off you go, off you go.
Nino: Everyone back to their places.
Sho: At this time, we have a message from a certain person. It will undoubtedly galvanize the four contestants, so please take a look.
Mao: What are you doing with these crazy old ladies, Doumyouji? There is no way you’re interested in them! You can work as hard as you like, it’s just FINE with me! Hmph!
Sho: And that was a message from Inoue Mao-san.
Nino: That’ll get ‘em worked up!
Jun: Just – a moment, okay? Guys, please don’t cause any trouble for my co-stars.
Sho: But that was Mao-chan…
Nino: All we asked her for was a comment!
Jun: I’d understand if it was Inoue Mao-chan. But she was speaking as Tsukushi just now!
Nino: Well that’s because there’s a white-hot battle going on here!
Jun: (…no clue what he was saying here ^^;; If anyone knows what he’s saying, please fill it in!)
Nino: But she said it, right? That there’s no way you’d be interested in these crazy old ladies.
Sho: Whaddaya think of that?
Ooshima: Tsukushi! MAKINO TSUKUSHIII! You penniless wench!
Sho: All right, everyone with me! Defeat Tsukushi!
Everyone: Ooh!
Arashi clapping and tilting themselves side-to-side in sync makes me think that the refrain going on in their heads is actually “We-get-to-torture-MatsuJun!” XD
Sho: So on this side, we have four ladies pressing their buttons, and then on this side, we’ll have one man pressing his button…
Jun: Just a sec. (He’s saying this a lot today, poor guy ~) Usually, you’d have people lined up on both sides, right? Well, since I’m only one man, shouldn’t there be five of us on this side?
Nino: No, this is the way it’s done in 2008.
Jun: Why would they even need buttons? I’m the only one doing any choosing here.
Sho: Yasuha-san, are you ready?
Yasuha: Yes, I’m wearing my lucky underwear today. *embarrassed giggle*
Matsushima: Very sexy.
Nino: Nice appeal, nice appeal.
Aiba: That’ll stick with MatsuJun.
Sho: First of all, you will each describe to MatsJun exactly how much you love him. Please use your appeal!
Sumita: Well, every morning I pass by a vending machine with MatsuJun’s face splashed across the side. And I’d say “Good morning!” to it.
Sho: And what do you say to Sumita-san’s feelings, MatsuJun?
MatsuJun: Huh? I don’t understand your question. What would you like me to say? (Way to sidestep the question, MatsuJun. Then again, I’m sure you’ve had lots of practice~)
Nino: It’s embarrassing for ME to watch you.
MatusJun: I STILL don’t get it!
Sho: Your turn, Hokuto-san!
Hokuto: You know, I really only love muscled, sporty types like Kensuke-kun. I think those men are really beautiful to watch.
Sumita: You know, Hokuta-san actually said outside that she hates skinny-looking guys, didn’t you?
Hokuta: Shut up, you hag! Well, how’s this for you: I know you’ve said that you like Katori Shingo!
Everyone: *Gasp! SHOCK!*
Ooshima: THROW HER OUT! OUT WITH HER!
Aiba+Sho: Get a hold of yourself, Ooshima-san!
Sho: Let us ask her! Is it true that you like Katori Shingo?
Sumita: I like him.
Ooshima: OUT!
Sumita: BUT, upon meeting MatsuJun, I’ve come to like him more!
Ooshima: Okay, I suppose we have to let her stay.
Sho: And next up, Yasuha-san.
Yasuha: Do you remember that time two summers ago by the sea?
Sho: Summer by the sea?
Nino: Everyone quiet for a minute!
Ooshima: Where did you go?
Jun: It was in Chiba.
Hokuto: What were you doing in Chiba?
Nino: Plus, MatsuJun remembers it too!
Yasuha: I went surfing there, along with my little brother Ippei.
Hokuto: You were only going with your younger brother, weren't you?
Ooshima: Pooh, it’s just Ippei.
Sho: And then?
Yasuha: I made yakisoba on the beach. And when I’d give it to him, he stared at me and said “What? No pickled ginger?” in this angry kind of way.
Someone: That’s an honest opinion from him!
Nino: And that stuck with you, huh?
Someone: It seems the little mushroom next to you(Ooshima-san) is looking a little pissed.
Ooshima: So was that BEFORE or AFTER your divorce, huh?
Yasuha: …That was before my divorce.
Ooshima: There you have it.
Sho: Now it’s time for Ooshima’s appeal.
Ooshima: Um…well… I love MatsuJun so much that… I’ve filed the files.
Nino: You’ve filed the files?
MatsuJun: Actually? Is that real?
Ooshima: *nod-nod*
Nino: That’s a really amazing file you have there. But what’s the best one in there?
Ooshima: Eeeeh???
Sho: Can we take a quick look? Ah, there’s even promos for our singles here! And over here…
No idol can resist a fan-made scrapbook!
Ooshima: Those are the bulletins from the Arashi Fan Club.
Matsushima: Uwaaa, you even have concert tickets.
Jun: And her name’s even on it!
Sho: Ja, let me just check. You got this by lottery, right?
Ooshima: That’s right.
Aiba: You didn’t ask the person concerned for it?
Ooshima: Right.
Sho: By the way… our June concert at Tokyo Dome… the tickets for that…?
Ooshima: I’VE GOT THEM! *Victory pose!*
OMG, lemme just say that I loved this woman the minute she took this out. Because that would TOTALLY BE ME if I was living in Japan. It is total and undeniable proof of loyalty to one’s idol. Hence why Jun probably wondered if it was fake or not, and had to check the name on the tickets. I think this is the one of the major reasons for his final decision, cuz he looks at it for a REALLY long time with a REALLY CUTE SMILE :D
Ooshima: Can I just show you my recommended one..? Okay, this one really gets me hyped up… nonono, where is it? Ah! Here it is!
And also? I RECOGNIZE some of those magazine shoots. *cry* It figures that Arashi is my impetus for turning into one of those fans. Like, Ooshima-type fans. T^T;; And judging by the sound of the screams, the audience recognizes it too XD
Ooshima: No, it’s not that! No, just wait! Everyone knows this already. In this issue, there are half-naked shots of them, right? Right here – “Sexuality.”
Audience: *SCREAM*
Me: OMG WHY DO THEY LOOK SO GOOD.
Ooshima: Ainnit nice? Ainnit? *flips through it* And! Andandandand!
Jun: And?
Ooshima: And, this already gets me so excited. But what makes me even more excited is this. This is Arashi, isn’t it? And on the flipside – me!
Caption: [A dream collaboration!]
I love this woman's expressions XD
Because when you’re a celebrity in Japan AND you’re also an Arashi fan, the logical thing to aim for is to show up ON THE SAME PAGE as your idols. Oh, Ooshima. You do all of us Arashi fans proud.
I mean, when you have WORK OPPORTUNITIES with Arashi, it’s much harder to keep up that worship-from-afar attitude that defines most fans, so I’ve got to hand it to this lady. She’s GOOD at being a fan.
Sho: At this point, we’d like to give each of you the opportunity to have MatsuJun do something for you.
Aiba: Feel free to say it. Go ahead and ask.
Ooshima: Hai! Um, the last time Morisanchuu was on your show, I had the opportunity of being served food by MatsuJun. And I thought the way he divvied up the ramen was fabulous, so I’d like him to do that for me again.
Everyone: Oooh.
Ooshimra: No, divvying up portions into little dishes is like his specialty.
Jun: It’s not a specialty. It’s perfectly ordinary.
Sho: Understood. Because you asked, we’ve prepared a little something for you. Bring out the ramen!
Sho: Come on over, Matsumoto.
Nino: What’s with this segment?
Aiba: Wanna stand closer?
Ooshima: Okay!
Jun: This is fine with me, but you know, it’s shockingly mundane.
Ooshima: It’s not mundane! Look! Looklooklook at his hand! His hand!
Jun: My hand?
Ooshima: Look at his chopsticks! Oh, oh, so pretty! Even the noodles look prettier! Oh! It’s spinach! And pork! So good!
Jun: Take it.
Ooshima: Thank you. Ah, and that’s the way you get his attention.
Matsushima: By the way, how would an ordinary man do it?
Sho gets ‘volunteered’ by Nino. AKA shoved. 8D
Sho: WATCH me, Ooshima. Everyone does it like that.
Sumita+Yasuha+Ooshima: Oh, that’s already different from how MatsuJun did it. Completely different. He held it like this. My, but you suck.
Sho: I don’t know how it’s supposed to be done! What do you want me to do?!
Ooshima: Whatever, just keep going. Don’t throw it back in!
LET'S COMPARE, SHALL WE?
MATSJUN
SHO
I think we can safely say that no, those ladies are NOT on crack. I can see the difference too.
Sho: Yasuha-san. What would you like Matsumoto-kun to do?
Yasuha: No, that’s good enough for me. Please just this one thing.
Sho: Make up your mind! What’s it going to be?
Yasuha: Um. Could you read your lines from…um… HanaYori Dango…
Nino: Right, we’re going to have to write Yasuha-san into the lines.
Sho: This is the last episode of HanaDan.
Yasuha: Omg, I can’t do this.
Ooshima: She really picked a good spot there.
Sho: Is this a good scene, Ooshima-san?
Ooshima: This is an awesome scene.
Sho: Is it one you’d recommend to everyone? Is it a scene that pros would pick?
Ooshima: This one…well… everyone gets it, right? It’s a thing of the television.
Nino: I’ve changed Makino into Yasuha for you.
Jun: Is it really better to change it?
Nino: You go ahead with that, if you please.
Sho: Very well. Matsumoto-kun and Yasuha-san’s scene. Hana Yori Dango’s finale. And – go!
For anyone living under a rock who hasn’t seen this scene from HanaDan Returns… basically, he’s asking her to marry him. Hence why Ooshima jumps in with a “HAI!” right at the end of it.
Commence crazy fangirl bitchslapping XD
Sho: And you, Hokuto-san?
Hokuto: That would be every girl’s dream, of course! To be carried liked a princess!
Ooshima: Ooh, you’re so lucky!
Jun: W-wait, wait, WAIT!
Nino: Yes?
Jun: (stage-whisper into Nino’s ear) I have to carry her?
Nino: ?
Jun: (almost hissing) I have to lift her up?
Nino: Weeeell, in the worse-case scenario–
Hokuto: Don’t keep me waiting, Jun-kun!
Nino: –Internal bleeding would be my guess.
Matsumiya fans will probably be able to live off this one cap for the next...oh, six months or so. I mean...there's hand-holding. And ear-whispering. And an arm 'round the shoulders.
...Tell me it wasn't just me who stared at this rather unusual scene, rewound, and immediately watched it again. Twice.
XD Snarky Nino for the win! I was *waiting* for his poisonous comment, and he did not disappoint!
Hokuto: Let’s do it in reverse!
Scarily unsteady
MUCH BETTER
I love the look between MatsuJun and Ohno as he’s being swung around by Hokuto. Ohno kinda scrunches up his face as he does it, socute ~
And for the record, Jun wasn't heaving or grunting or anything to lift that lady up, but it still looked pretty unsteady to me. I thought her carrying him makes a good deal more sense than the other way around.
Rest of the episode coming soon!
And as always, EDITS AND CORRECTIONS WELCOME! ^__^
BUT, to make up for that, I have stuffed the entry with CAPS. For. Um. Illustrating purposes. *cough*
Enjoy!
Episode credits to the lovely
ferfaWARNING: Long entry.
Sho: First of all, we have this: Hana Yori Dango Final, in theatres June 28th.
Caption: [Hana Yori Dango Series, in the role of Doumyouji Tsukasa: Matsumoto Jun]
Jun: Wait just a sec here –
Nino: That’s him right here!
Sho: And with that, we also have THIS: In commemoration of the opening of this movie, today, we’ll be doing the special HANA YORI MATSUJUN, Project Love-Love Attack!
Jun: Um. S’cuse me, sorry, let me just get this straight. I am indeed in a movie called Hana Yori Dango Final –
Aiba: Coming out June 28th, right?
Jun: Right. But it has…absolutely nothing to do with this show.
Sho: Stop raining on the parade!
Aiba: Think about our feelings! This is our selfless love to you from all of us!
Jun: What is this Love-Love Attack anyway…?
Sho: The plan this time is, seeing as it’s the HanaDan Final Special, we will be loaning MatsuJun out for a day, to go on a date.
Narrator: Yes, MatsuJun will be going out on a date with the winner today! And the four contestants will be…?
Sho: What do you think, Matsushima-san?
Matsushima: The person in question seems to have no motivation to do this at all. Are you sure this is okay?
Jun: Hold on, I don’t even get what’s going on!
Sho: He’s just twitching with anticipation, is all.
Matsushima: Ah, I see.
Jun: I’m twitching, but for a different reason.
Fantasy #1: (And watch Jun SINK TO HIS KNEES in uncontrollable laughter. XD) Jun and I would be walking along the beach, when suddenly, he’d ask me “Have I told you I love you?” (Jun: Nope!) No, you’ve never told me! Today, I’ll give you a bath! I promise to show you how deeply I’ve fallen for you.
Ooshima: (Man, I LOVE this lady XD) I don’t care if I have to get down and dirty today. I’m gonna WIN!
Aiba: Come on, Ooshima-san. Take a look at MatsuJun.
Ooshima: *Looks. Hyperventilates* It’s really him!
Matsushima: You love him so much that you’d need your husband’s permission, wouldn’t you?
Ooshima: Uh-huh.
MatsuJun: Are you serious? *0__0*
Ooshima: I’m serious here!
Fantasy #2: Cool and handsome MatsuJun as a prosecutor in court would be interrogating me closely. In the court of Love, I will lose to no one! I’ll win Jun’s heart!
Sho: We have the Lawyer Sumita-san with us.
Sumita: Thank you for having me here today.
Ooshima: Don’t touch him! Don’t you TOUCH HIM!
Sumita: I think I’m a half-step ahead of my competition today.
Aiba: Ah. Because MatusJun likes older women, ne?
Nino: Ooshima-san!
Ooshima: Shuuuuuu….
Nino: Stop with the Shuu-shuu! You’re doing it on TV!
Fantasy #3: Jun-kun would grab the water bottle that I was drinking from and take a swig with a casual “Lemme have a sip?” (Jun: Who IS that?) It would be an indirect kiss! I’ll show him my knockout swing in the arena of love!
Jun: What’s with this music?
Sho: This is a change of pace. So, Hokuto-san, you’re a fan of MatsuJun’s?
Hokuto: Well, you see, I’m good friends with Aiba-kun and Kensuke. But when I asked him for Matsujun’s mail address, he wouldn’t tell me! So obviously, I had to come in person to get him for myself.
(Aiba is a dependable and trustworthy bandmate! He doesn’t let random ppl access the other members! Unlike Drunk!Ohno *cough* who will dial up Nino for any John, Dick, or Harry who asks. At 2:00am in the morning.)
Fantasy #4: In a café where we can see the harbour, we’d be sharing a fruit parfait between the two of us. And when Jun sees the whipped cream on my face, he would lick it off me. (Nino: Is she a perv?) Today, I’ll definitely win Jun’s heart! (Jun: I don’t lick!)
Yasuha: Actually, me and Jun have a secret too!
Sho: What? What? WHAT? What is it?!
Nino: Look at that face! *points at Ooshima*
Sho: Oh, Ooshima-san…
Nino: These things can’t be helped! If you have them, you have them! These are the facts.
Aiba: Tell us what the secret is!
Yasuha: Maybe later… *secretive smile*
Sho: Today, we have gathered four outstanding fans of MatsuJun together on this show.
Sumita: Would you think that it’s strange to have four weird women gathered here for you?
Hokuta: Speak for yourself, Ms. Lawyer!
Ooshima: We’re not weird!~
Nino: Let’s not fight, now!
(Commence first of many bitch-fights over Matsu that we will witness this episode.)
Ooshima (to Yasuha): DON’T TOUCH HIM! SERIOUSLY! You know, I’ve got to say, didn’t you get divorced just a little while ago? And aren’t you here ON THE REBOUND? Don’t you dare come here with half-hearted feelings! She doesn’t need MatsuJun, she’d be okay with anyone!
Aiba: Stop her, MatsuJun! Stop her!
MatsuJun: Now, now, now. *touches her arm*
Ooshima: Aan ^__^
Aiba: Yosh! Off you go, off you go.
Nino: Everyone back to their places.
Sho: At this time, we have a message from a certain person. It will undoubtedly galvanize the four contestants, so please take a look.
Mao: What are you doing with these crazy old ladies, Doumyouji? There is no way you’re interested in them! You can work as hard as you like, it’s just FINE with me! Hmph!
Sho: And that was a message from Inoue Mao-san.
Nino: That’ll get ‘em worked up!
Jun: Just – a moment, okay? Guys, please don’t cause any trouble for my co-stars.
Sho: But that was Mao-chan…
Nino: All we asked her for was a comment!
Jun: I’d understand if it was Inoue Mao-chan. But she was speaking as Tsukushi just now!
Nino: Well that’s because there’s a white-hot battle going on here!
Jun: (…no clue what he was saying here ^^;; If anyone knows what he’s saying, please fill it in!)
Nino: But she said it, right? That there’s no way you’d be interested in these crazy old ladies.
Sho: Whaddaya think of that?
Ooshima: Tsukushi! MAKINO TSUKUSHIII! You penniless wench!
Sho: All right, everyone with me! Defeat Tsukushi!
Everyone: Ooh!
Arashi clapping and tilting themselves side-to-side in sync makes me think that the refrain going on in their heads is actually “We-get-to-torture-MatsuJun!” XD
Sho: So on this side, we have four ladies pressing their buttons, and then on this side, we’ll have one man pressing his button…
Jun: Just a sec. (He’s saying this a lot today, poor guy ~) Usually, you’d have people lined up on both sides, right? Well, since I’m only one man, shouldn’t there be five of us on this side?
Nino: No, this is the way it’s done in 2008.
Jun: Why would they even need buttons? I’m the only one doing any choosing here.
Sho: Yasuha-san, are you ready?
Yasuha: Yes, I’m wearing my lucky underwear today. *embarrassed giggle*
Matsushima: Very sexy.
Nino: Nice appeal, nice appeal.
Aiba: That’ll stick with MatsuJun.
Sho: First of all, you will each describe to MatsJun exactly how much you love him. Please use your appeal!
Sumita: Well, every morning I pass by a vending machine with MatsuJun’s face splashed across the side. And I’d say “Good morning!” to it.
Sho: And what do you say to Sumita-san’s feelings, MatsuJun?
MatsuJun: Huh? I don’t understand your question. What would you like me to say? (Way to sidestep the question, MatsuJun. Then again, I’m sure you’ve had lots of practice~)
Nino: It’s embarrassing for ME to watch you.
MatusJun: I STILL don’t get it!
Sho: Your turn, Hokuto-san!
Hokuto: You know, I really only love muscled, sporty types like Kensuke-kun. I think those men are really beautiful to watch.
Sumita: You know, Hokuta-san actually said outside that she hates skinny-looking guys, didn’t you?
Hokuta: Shut up, you hag! Well, how’s this for you: I know you’ve said that you like Katori Shingo!
Everyone: *Gasp! SHOCK!*
Ooshima: THROW HER OUT! OUT WITH HER!
Aiba+Sho: Get a hold of yourself, Ooshima-san!
Sho: Let us ask her! Is it true that you like Katori Shingo?
Sumita: I like him.
Ooshima: OUT!
Sumita: BUT, upon meeting MatsuJun, I’ve come to like him more!
Ooshima: Okay, I suppose we have to let her stay.
Sho: And next up, Yasuha-san.
Yasuha: Do you remember that time two summers ago by the sea?
Sho: Summer by the sea?
Nino: Everyone quiet for a minute!
Ooshima: Where did you go?
Jun: It was in Chiba.
Hokuto: What were you doing in Chiba?
Nino: Plus, MatsuJun remembers it too!
Yasuha: I went surfing there, along with my little brother Ippei.
Hokuto: You were only going with your younger brother, weren't you?
Ooshima: Pooh, it’s just Ippei.
Sho: And then?
Yasuha: I made yakisoba on the beach. And when I’d give it to him, he stared at me and said “What? No pickled ginger?” in this angry kind of way.
Someone: That’s an honest opinion from him!
Nino: And that stuck with you, huh?
Someone: It seems the little mushroom next to you(Ooshima-san) is looking a little pissed.
Ooshima: So was that BEFORE or AFTER your divorce, huh?
Yasuha: …That was before my divorce.
Ooshima: There you have it.
Sho: Now it’s time for Ooshima’s appeal.
Ooshima: Um…well… I love MatsuJun so much that… I’ve filed the files.
Nino: You’ve filed the files?
MatsuJun: Actually? Is that real?
Ooshima: *nod-nod*
Nino: That’s a really amazing file you have there. But what’s the best one in there?
Ooshima: Eeeeh???
Sho: Can we take a quick look? Ah, there’s even promos for our singles here! And over here…
No idol can resist a fan-made scrapbook!
Ooshima: Those are the bulletins from the Arashi Fan Club.
Matsushima: Uwaaa, you even have concert tickets.
Jun: And her name’s even on it!
Sho: Ja, let me just check. You got this by lottery, right?
Ooshima: That’s right.
Aiba: You didn’t ask the person concerned for it?
Ooshima: Right.
Sho: By the way… our June concert at Tokyo Dome… the tickets for that…?
Ooshima: I’VE GOT THEM! *Victory pose!*
OMG, lemme just say that I loved this woman the minute she took this out. Because that would TOTALLY BE ME if I was living in Japan. It is total and undeniable proof of loyalty to one’s idol. Hence why Jun probably wondered if it was fake or not, and had to check the name on the tickets. I think this is the one of the major reasons for his final decision, cuz he looks at it for a REALLY long time with a REALLY CUTE SMILE :D
Ooshima: Can I just show you my recommended one..? Okay, this one really gets me hyped up… nonono, where is it? Ah! Here it is!
And also? I RECOGNIZE some of those magazine shoots. *cry* It figures that Arashi is my impetus for turning into one of those fans. Like, Ooshima-type fans. T^T;; And judging by the sound of the screams, the audience recognizes it too XD
Ooshima: No, it’s not that! No, just wait! Everyone knows this already. In this issue, there are half-naked shots of them, right? Right here – “Sexuality.”
Audience: *SCREAM*
Me: OMG WHY DO THEY LOOK SO GOOD.
Ooshima: Ainnit nice? Ainnit? *flips through it* And! Andandandand!
Jun: And?
Ooshima: And, this already gets me so excited. But what makes me even more excited is this. This is Arashi, isn’t it? And on the flipside – me!
Caption: [A dream collaboration!]
I love this woman's expressions XD
Because when you’re a celebrity in Japan AND you’re also an Arashi fan, the logical thing to aim for is to show up ON THE SAME PAGE as your idols. Oh, Ooshima. You do all of us Arashi fans proud.
I mean, when you have WORK OPPORTUNITIES with Arashi, it’s much harder to keep up that worship-from-afar attitude that defines most fans, so I’ve got to hand it to this lady. She’s GOOD at being a fan.
Sho: At this point, we’d like to give each of you the opportunity to have MatsuJun do something for you.
Aiba: Feel free to say it. Go ahead and ask.
Ooshima: Hai! Um, the last time Morisanchuu was on your show, I had the opportunity of being served food by MatsuJun. And I thought the way he divvied up the ramen was fabulous, so I’d like him to do that for me again.
Everyone: Oooh.
Ooshimra: No, divvying up portions into little dishes is like his specialty.
Jun: It’s not a specialty. It’s perfectly ordinary.
Sho: Understood. Because you asked, we’ve prepared a little something for you. Bring out the ramen!
Sho: Come on over, Matsumoto.
Nino: What’s with this segment?
Aiba: Wanna stand closer?
Ooshima: Okay!
Jun: This is fine with me, but you know, it’s shockingly mundane.
Ooshima: It’s not mundane! Look! Looklooklook at his hand! His hand!
Jun: My hand?
Ooshima: Look at his chopsticks! Oh, oh, so pretty! Even the noodles look prettier! Oh! It’s spinach! And pork! So good!
Jun: Take it.
Ooshima: Thank you. Ah, and that’s the way you get his attention.
Matsushima: By the way, how would an ordinary man do it?
Sho gets ‘volunteered’ by Nino. AKA shoved. 8D
Sho: WATCH me, Ooshima. Everyone does it like that.
Sumita+Yasuha+Ooshima: Oh, that’s already different from how MatsuJun did it. Completely different. He held it like this. My, but you suck.
Sho: I don’t know how it’s supposed to be done! What do you want me to do?!
Ooshima: Whatever, just keep going. Don’t throw it back in!
LET'S COMPARE, SHALL WE?
MATSJUN
SHO
I think we can safely say that no, those ladies are NOT on crack. I can see the difference too.
Sho: Yasuha-san. What would you like Matsumoto-kun to do?
Yasuha: No, that’s good enough for me. Please just this one thing.
Sho: Make up your mind! What’s it going to be?
Yasuha: Um. Could you read your lines from…um… HanaYori Dango…
Nino: Right, we’re going to have to write Yasuha-san into the lines.
Sho: This is the last episode of HanaDan.
Yasuha: Omg, I can’t do this.
Ooshima: She really picked a good spot there.
Sho: Is this a good scene, Ooshima-san?
Ooshima: This is an awesome scene.
Sho: Is it one you’d recommend to everyone? Is it a scene that pros would pick?
Ooshima: This one…well… everyone gets it, right? It’s a thing of the television.
Nino: I’ve changed Makino into Yasuha for you.
Jun: Is it really better to change it?
Nino: You go ahead with that, if you please.
Sho: Very well. Matsumoto-kun and Yasuha-san’s scene. Hana Yori Dango’s finale. And – go!
For anyone living under a rock who hasn’t seen this scene from HanaDan Returns… basically, he’s asking her to marry him. Hence why Ooshima jumps in with a “HAI!” right at the end of it.
Commence crazy fangirl bitchslapping XD
Sho: And you, Hokuto-san?
Hokuto: That would be every girl’s dream, of course! To be carried liked a princess!
Ooshima: Ooh, you’re so lucky!
Jun: W-wait, wait, WAIT!
Nino: Yes?
Jun: (stage-whisper into Nino’s ear) I have to carry her?
Nino: ?
Jun: (almost hissing) I have to lift her up?
Nino: Weeeell, in the worse-case scenario–
Hokuto: Don’t keep me waiting, Jun-kun!
Nino: –Internal bleeding would be my guess.
Matsumiya fans will probably be able to live off this one cap for the next...oh, six months or so. I mean...there's hand-holding. And ear-whispering. And an arm 'round the shoulders.
...Tell me it wasn't just me who stared at this rather unusual scene, rewound, and immediately watched it again. Twice.
XD Snarky Nino for the win! I was *waiting* for his poisonous comment, and he did not disappoint!
Hokuto: Let’s do it in reverse!
Scarily unsteady
MUCH BETTER
I love the look between MatsuJun and Ohno as he’s being swung around by Hokuto. Ohno kinda scrunches up his face as he does it, socute ~
And for the record, Jun wasn't heaving or grunting or anything to lift that lady up, but it still looked pretty unsteady to me. I thought her carrying him makes a good deal more sense than the other way around.
Rest of the episode coming soon!
And as always, EDITS AND CORRECTIONS WELCOME! ^__^
Current Mood: 
cheerful
cheerfulCurrent Music: Take me Faraway
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